Not to long ago this past week, it came to my attention that a friend of mine from Landmark College, the first of a long winding academic career, had passed away.
Hayden, as depicted here, I’ve met through one of my art classes. It was some time ago back between 2012 and 2013 that I shared the same professor with her, Samuel Rowlett. I remember she was one of the most creative people at Landmark at the time I went there and I ended up finding out that she was also one of the most kick-ass writers at the school who won a poetry slam at the time. I actually had the opportunity to hear her read once.
There was something about Hayden that reminded me of myself, perhaps because back then I saw that she was a rebel soul. She hailed from Brooklyn where eventually I would find myself in learning over at Pratt Institute as time went by over the years.
Only now do I realize that there were a couple of passions that me and her shared. She was one of the few people who have inspired me to go further with my creative career and, to not have some remembrance to the time I crossed paths with her would be in a way, forgetting a part of what made me keep going, even being one of the two people who have inspired me to get a minor in creative writing.
There were other people who I have known from Landmark who have passed over the years, however, Hayden was the first one who actually made me cry upon hearing this.
With all that being said, this one’s for her.
Giving credit where credit is due, You can find the original poem on this art on her Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/p/B5PYvIQF6GV/?utm_source=ig_web_copy_link
EDIT 06/20/20:
FREE SEEING
Were we just rebel souls?
Had we both sought escape?
Were we both broken hearts?
Was it all of those reasons?
I began to ask myself sitting here
Remembering how we smoked cigarettes,
Then critiquing each others work
Right after our break was over.
But I cried when I heard the truth,
I began to dive into your mind
Before it all happened,
Reading your words online.
How the sun burns the skin,
When we take any kind of poison.
Like vampires to ashes, melting
Free seeing skin with cold eyes staring in the void.
I tell myself, that could have been me,
Had it not been for realizing whom I had lost
Before we crossed paths, in a hellhole of sharks.
For a few moments, I felt a small spiral.
But then I realized why you reached out,
It wasn’t just for joy,
A desperate plea while lost,
Not knowing what could bring you back.
Behaviors are absurd, nothing rational about them.
The same could be said for any problem people have,
But we were the ones who tried to numb ourselves from it.
Free seeing skin with cold eyes staring in the void.
As my woes of never meeting again settled,
I still miss thou smile you brought us all.
Even troubled, you brought us joy,
Without that numb feeling.
It’s never easy to accept what is lost,
Yet here I am, acknowledging my own mistakes,
Why I forced myself into the light for warmth.
Shedding free seeing skin with cold eyes staring in the void.
Andrew Orluk 